HARRISONBURG, Va. (WHSV) – Over the past nine months, WHSV has highlighted various aspects of pregnancy and motherhood that show how exciting and sometimes challenging it all can be. Having a baby can be such a joyful experience, but it can also take a toll on your mental health.
After months of trying to start a family of their own, Rana Shank and her husband were delighted to find out she was pregnant.
We tried for 13 months, I think. I remember we were about to call the doctor to see if something was wrong, and it was, and it was the best experience of my life, Shank said.
However, she did not realize how difficult the pregnancy would be for her physically and mentally.
Society puts you in this bubble that you’re pregnant, so you have to shine, you have to look beautiful, you have to enjoy it, you have to look for the perfect dress… And you’re bloated, you look like a bloated fish, and you hate nausea , you hate everything, you start questioning the pregnancy why did I do this? I could have adopted a dog, Shank said.
Due to the burden of her pregnancy, she found it difficult to bond with her baby until she welcomed him into the world.
Not many people get that, the first shot, they get the emotions and the feelings and the love for the child. “I didn’t want my baby until the baby came, and I saw the baby and it hit me that he’s my flesh and blood, he’s mine,” Shank said.
Dr. Cathy Slusher with Sentara understands that everyone’s pregnancy journey is different and she and her team are here to help through it all.
“We have the ability to provide counseling, we can provide medication choices that are safe to take during pregnancy and help with that chemical rebalancing, we can provide opportunities for social workers if there is a need for financial assistance or personal assistance,” said Dr. Slusher.
While Shank was relieved to give birth to a healthy baby boy and excited to begin this new chapter of her life, her struggles continued after the birth.
Everybody’s like, you’ll know what to do once the baby comes, I didn’t know, Shank said. I didn’t know what to do. I wanted the baby, but I didn’t know what to do.
Shank said she felt overwhelmed and began experiencing postpartum depression once she realized she wouldn’t be able to breastfeed.
“Everything I read talks about breastfeeding and how important it is to the baby, and it makes you feel like that’s what a mother is supposed to do because everyone else can do everything else,” Shank said.
Postpartum depression can look different for different people and can happen right away or weeks after giving birth.
The person goes to a place that is not normal and is not suitable for good care and good relationships with their family, said Dr. Slusher. Sometimes this feeling is that they become completely consumed with the baby to the point that they neglect their personal hygiene, allowing other people to hold the baby or interfere with the baby because they are so protective and afraid that something will happen to them. happen.
On the other end of the spectrum, others may be attracted to the baby and want nothing to do with it because they are so overwhelmed.
When you start to feel down, Shank said it’s important to let your spouse or loved ones know so they can make sure you don’t harm yourself or the baby.
Family, spouse, significant others, we try to make them aware at that hospital before they go home that this is a real thing and you may be the one to contact on behalf of the mother to get the help she needs, Dr. Slusher explained.
Shank said she didn’t realize what she was feeling was postpartum depression until she went back to the doctor for a routine checkup. She said she was filling out a survey about how she was feeling and her providers stepped in to help.
Be visible, be honest, and if you feel like you’re pushing something else, stop us. We want to listen and we want to know and help, said Dr. Slusher.
Shank said it was the support she received from her providers and family that helped her overcome the challenges and feel ready to welcome her second child.
They were there for me. They accepted me for who I am. They checked me for every little detail that bothered me, she said. As scary as it is, they make you realize that it’s normal and you’re not the only one going through it.
While Shank is feeling more confident and knows what to expect the second time around, she said she’s still a little nervous about the pregnancy.
What comes out of it is so much better than all the shuffling and ducking she does, Shank said.
Her advice to other moms who might be feeling overwhelmed: Babies are made to survive new parenthood, and that sentence makes a lot of sense because, yes, they’re so fragile and you don’t know if you’re going to break… This sentence is a breath of fresh air, like, yeah, I can do that. They don’t break like I think, Shank said.
She also mentioned that it’s okay not to enjoy pregnancy, it’s okay not to feel beautiful, and not everyone is able to produce milk to breastfeed.
You’re still doing a lot of work besides breastfeeding, so that’s okay. This happens and is normal, so don’t worry about it, she added.
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